Friday, October 31, 2008

Is it over yet?

Some days I feel like I deserve some kind of award if I have made it through the day without hurting someone. Or myself. Today was one of those days. I won't go on and on about the details, I'll just give you some background info and let you paint your own picture of what today looked like here at Roberts Ranch.

1.) I've been off my beloved prozac for 2 weeks and 6 days. I can assure you there is NONE in my system. My kids and husband will testify to that. This is a big adjustment when you've been taking it for 5 years. That's right, 5. One year for each child.

2.)I still have a head cold, although it's MUCH better now than it has been all week.

3.)One of my children, who shall remain nameless, has apparently gone deaf and hears NOTHING I say to him/her unless I scream it at him/her.

4.) For some odd reason, my throat is raw. hm.

5.) Combine all this with the regular women/hormone thing.

Get the picture? Here, let me make it clear for you.

Rhonda on the outside:

Rhonda on the inside:

Thankfully, I'm married to a very, VERY funny man, who loves me deeply and rolls with the punches.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008


Oh, happy, happy, Happy day!
School's over kids. Go play.

p.s. I'm almost finshed...i was up with a cold till 2ish, so why not read, right?

Monday, October 27, 2008

Out of the Mouths of Babes.

Got this from my sweet friend Mary. Enjoy!

A wife invited some people to dinner.

At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said,

"Would you like to say the blessing?"

"I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied.

"Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered.

The daughter bowed her head and said,

"Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Hey!! I know that guy!

These pictures aren't anything exciting to most people reading this blog. I, however, was really excited to see them. Why? Because I know that guy! No, not John McCain, the other guy off to his right, our left,with the black coat and McCain tag. That's Walter Peterson...he was the president of the my alma mater, Franklin Pierce College. Man, I LOVED Wally P.! He's a super friendly guy. Actually, I think this is the first picture I've seen of him when he wasn't smiling. He's a really cool old guy.
But that's not all that's cool (to me) about this photo! Oh no, friends, there's more! After getting over the weirdness of these 2 guys in a photo...(well, it's really not as weird as I thought, but I'll get back to that)...I noticed that their surroundings looked pretty familiar. Well, SURE THEY DID!!!

That's the Peterborough Diner!! I lived in Peterborough for a year or so after I graduated college. Man, I LOVED the Peterborough Diner!

Anyway, I found this photo online a while back. I wanted to blog about Peterborough because I LOVED living there. It is, after all, a good town to live in. Most of you won't get that, but that's ok. So, back to my story, I googled "Peterborough, NH" to find pictures so I could show you some of my fav spots. I wasn't too thrilled with what Google had on the first few pages, so I went for "Peterborough Diner"...and BAM! John McCain and Walter Peterson. "How odd!", I thought, "What are the chances?"

Well, pretty good actually, because as it turns out, Wally P. was the governor of New Hampshire from 1969-1973. Before that he was the Speaker of the NH House of Representatives, and a State rep. before that. Busy guy, Mr. Peterson.

I had no clue. Although I'm sure at some point in my college years, someone may have said to me at a party, "Dude! Did you know that like, Peterson was the (blankety-blank) Governor of New Hampshire? The (blankety-blank-blank) GOVERNOR, Dude!"

My roommate Shannon probably not only knew this but told me a few times herself.
It would've gone like this:

her: "Hey, there's Wally. He's the former Governor of New Hampshire."
me: "Cool. Didn't know that."
At this point we would both smile and she would say, "Hey President Peterson." And he of course would already be smiling (he smiled ALOT) and would say, "Afternoon, Ladies." This situation is likely to have repeated itself many times because I had NO idea about such things, and my groovy roommate did.

So...that's it.

Educational it working?

The following is a conversation I had with my 7 year old daughter and 9 year old son.

him: "Are we watching a movie tonight."

me: "Probably not."

her: "You mean we didn't watch TV all day today...for NOTHING?"

me: "Not for nothing. It's good for you to skip TV for a day or 2."

him: "You mean it's not good for us but you let us watch it everyday?"

me: "It's ok to watch a little. Sometimes it's fun to do something just for fun. But too much TV is not good for you."

him: "But what if it's educable? Then it's ok, right?"


him: "Right? If it's educable, it's ok."

me: " not. And I believe the word you're looking for is 'educational', not 'educable'. Educable is not a word."**

him: "Oh. I meant educational."

**I have since learned that "educable" is a word. It means "able to be educated." A brilliant wordsmith pointed this out me. He could've posted a comment telling me so, but he chose to tell me privately, because he's great.

Friday, October 24, 2008



I'm preordering mine TODAY y'all!!!!

Right after I do the mair dance.

p.s. Heeeheee...I ordered it! heeeheeee...AND Zora and Nicky. yay!!!I'm giddy.


As it turns out we will be home this weekend. Abby is throwing up.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Headache Hints

For the past few days I've had a dull headache that seemed to slowly get worse. I didn't think much of it since I've had cold/allergy syptoms as well. Yesterday, however, came the headache from hell. It started out like a bad sinus know, the kind that feels like your brain will come crashing through the front of your skull if you bend over. During this stage I received the following advice from my oldest son, (who is 9 today, by the way):

"Mom, whatever you do, DON'T SNEEZE!"

Good advice. I also have more things you should avoid doing when you have a killer headache.
1.) Coughing
2.) laughing
3.) being around a barking dog
4.) bouncing (especially in a vehicle)
5.) grocery shopping with 5 kids
6.) turning you head too quickly
7.) getting up too quickly from a chair

If and when your headache progesses to migraine pain and beyond, here is more advice.

1.) Call your doctor. Explain that you're skull is obviously much too small for your throbbing brain, and get him to call in a prescription to the pharmacy. Get someone who loves you to get for you. If you explain that you're at migraine level pain, they'll do it.
2.)NO ice packs on the head. My niece warned me this didn't work, but i was desperate and tried it anyway. The theory is that the cold will contract the blood vessels in your head and relieve some pressure, bringing you comfort. This is a LIE from THE PIT OF HELL. I don't know who came up the this idea but I'm quite certain they NEVER had a headache and tried it themselves.
3.)Don't be near people who are funny on a regular basis.
4.)Don't even think about funny people or things.
5.)Lay on a bed in a dark room, close your eyes and DO NOT MOVE YOUR HEAD.
6.)Don't raise your eyebrows.
7.)Don't smile. But don't cry either.
8.)Breathe through the pain like you're in labor, and NO, I'm not kidding.
9.)Don't wonder if you're dying if you are an emotional person. This will lead to crying which will cause enough pain to convince you that you ARE dying, thus causing more crying, more pain, and so on.
10.)Massage a littl peppermint oil onto your forehead. Sounds dopey but it smells great and the tingling sensation is relaxing. It by no means takes the pain away, but it does relax you. Be sure to wash your hands after you're though.
11.) If whatever medicine your doctor gives you isn't working, call and ask if you can take some ibuprofen with it. If he says yes, take the MAXIMUM amount he says is safe.
12.)If you are getting depressed or bored laying motionless in a dark room, try putting on a dark hoodie with the hood pulled over your eyes, turn on a dim light, and listen to soothing music softly, or interesting talk radio.
13.)Recite poetry, favorite quotes or scripture verses to get your mind off yourself.
15.)Be thankful you're not homeless, addicted to drugs and going through withdrawal, or living in a third world country where you would have NOTHING but your lousy migraine.
15.) Sleep, if you can.
16.) Get someone who loves you to write down every time you take a pill and what time you took it. If they go Med Nazi on you and refuses to give your pills until the very VERY minute you can take it, kick them out. For the record, my husband is NOT a med nazi. He is the personification of awesome.
17.) If none of that works, call your doctor again. Do whatever he says, unless he recommends an ice pack. (evil lie)

That's all I have for now. This is the voice of experience ya'll. I was so certain I was dying of a brain anuerism that I had my husband's future wife picked out for him. No, i didn't call my mom because she would have freaked out if she heard how pitiful I was. I figured if I was dying, I would wait until the people at the ER reveiwed the pictures of my brain and told me I was dying. THEN i would have called her. It's not good to get your mom all freaked out when she's about 150,000 miles away, only to say, "Ooops! Sorry mom, false alarm. It just something I ate."
It wasn't something I ate by the way. AlthoughI don't think it was migraine either, since it covered my entire head, my ears, and at one point blurred my vision. (That's when I picked out my husband's next wife. (She's very pretty and all would like her.)
ANYWAY, we think that it was reaction to a combination of St. John's Wort and Fluoxetine(prozac). Did I intentionally mix these two? Nooooooooo. I'm no doctor, (or herbalist) by a LONG shot, but I did check out St. John's Wort online and every article I read said to be sure the antidepressant was out of your system before you start on the herbal supplement. What I did NOT do was check to see how long it takes for Fluoxetine to leave your system. Why, you ask? Well, sometimes I'm an idot.
So, although I did wait 5 days after I stopped taking fluoxetine to begin on the St. John's Wort, I should have waited 14 days. BIG difference in those numbers.

By the way, my doctor (who I think may be an angel) prescribed Cephadyn to me, which is a combo of acetaminaphen and butalbital, and is supposed to be "pretty strong stuff." uh-huh. Can't prove it by me baby, because it didn't even touch the pain. It wasn't till I had taken 3 doses (at the right time, mind you, so I had been on the stuff for twelve hours)that I got a little relief. An hour after the third dose, I took 600 mg (3 pills) of ibuprofen, and then I started to feel better. 6 hours later, I skipped the cephadyn and took 4 ibuprofen and finally was comfortable enough to sleep. Today I woke up at 6:00 am, took 3 ibuprofen and went back to bed. I woke later at 10:00 and have felt MUCH better all day today. In fact we're still going on our camping trip this weekend. With ibuprofen, of course. And no St. John's Wort for at least another 4 days.

So, that's pretty much it.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

When Your Hut's On Fire

I received this from a girlfriend of mine. Enjoy!

When Your Hut's On Fire

The only survivor of a shipwreck was washed up on a small, uninhabited
island. He prayed feverishly for God to rescue him. Every day he scanned the horizon for help, but none seemed forthcoming. Exhausted, he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood to protect himself from the elements, and to store his few possessions. One day, after scavenging for food, he arrived home to find his little hut in flames, with smoke rolling up to the sky. He felt the worst
had happened, and everything was lost. He was stunned with disbelief,
grief, and anger. He cried out, 'God! How could you do this to me?'
Early the next day, he was awakened by the sound of a ship approaching
the island! It had come to rescue him! 'How did you know I was here?'
asked the weary man of his rescuers.

'We saw your smoke signal,' they replied.

The Moral of This Story: It's easy to get discouraged when things are going bad, but we shouldn't lose heart, because God is at work in our lives, even in the midst of our pain and suffering. Remember that the next time your little hut seems to be burning to the ground. It just may be a smoke signal that summons the Grace of God.

NO warning!

Wyatt Jr. hit us with a sneak attack vomit missile a just a few short moments ago. Damage was minimal due to hardwood floors and Wyatt Jr.'s keen sense of vomitousness that unabled him to sit up and lean over the bed before impact. Thankfully, no one was in the line of fire.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Fair Warning - Custom comment codes for MySpace, Hi5, Friendster and more

Wyatt Jr., Ben and Lizzie are all sick. Wyatt Jr. had chest pains and accelerated pulse. Ben was having trouble breathing and is now being treated for pneumonia. Wyatt and Lizzie have 103.0 fevers. So, stay away y'all.

UPDATE: Wyatt and Ben are much better. Jury is still out on Lizzie. Mom may be going down with the ship.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Need to Know Info

My mom sent this to me today. It's very useful information for you men out there. It just may save your life one day. It will help you understand women a little better.


(1) "Fine!": This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) "Five Minutes.": If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch TV before helping around the house.

(3)"Nothing.": This is the calm before the storm, particularly when it is used as an answer to the question, "What's wrong?" Nothing means something and you should be on your toes.

4) "Go Ahead.": This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually not a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) "That's Okay.": This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. It is soooooo not okay. "That's okay" means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) "Thanks!": A woman is thanking you. Do not question, or faint. Just say "You're welcome." (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say "You're welcome" ... that will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) "Whatever.": Plead for your life. You’re as good as dead.

(9) "Don't worry about it, I got it.": Worry. Alot. When you hear this it means that a woman has told you to do something several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Anna Frances


Monday, October 13, 2008

Baby Update

Anna Frances Smith is here! 7lbs. 14 oz.....20.5 inches long...some time around 7:30 pm. She was delivered by C-section, and she and mom are doing well,Praise God!

Little Jesus, wast Thou shy
Once and just so small as I?
And what did it feel like to be
Out of Heaven, and just like me?

- Francis Thompson "Ex Ore Infantium"

No pictures yet. More news later.

Fair, Kittens and Labor

As it turns out, bringing 5 children to the fair was not the stupidest thing I've ever done at the fair. It was GREAT! But, I don't have pics yet. Patience, y'all!

I've been a little preoccupied with this litter of kittens that we found under the AC vent. There were about 5, we have 2 now. The momma moved the others. One we have we had to rescue from the jaws of Darcy, our rott/shepherd mix. The other I took to the vet had a wolfworm. NASTY! They are both calico kittens, female, one named Peeka, one name Boo. Each are worthy of their own blog post someday.

But not TODAY!!!

Today, my little neice Anna Frances Smith arrives. She's on her way now. She's got about 6 centimeters to go. Maybe even less by now. I'm very distracted today and want desperately to be there but she's in silly ol' Mobile Alabama. sheeeesh! So, I'll have to wait till Saturday. She'll only be about 5 days old. Still fresh from Heaven! Gotta go get some coffee. I'll keep you posted.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

The Big Day!

Tomorrow is Fair Day. I LOVE fairs. I missed it last year....and the year before that too. I went the first year we moved here and I'm really looking forward to going again. When we lived in Texas we went to the State Fair once. As are most things in Texas, the State Fair was BIG. (say hello to Big Tex!)I don't remember's all a blur. Well, actually,I do remember seeing a sign for fried twinkies. (groan...hurts just thinking about it)
When I lived in Austin, I went to the rodeo. Now THAT was fun! I went once with my friend Shannon...i think we saw McBride and the Ride...although I have no idea who that is. I wasn't into country music then. I also was sweating ALOT because i didn't realize how hot October is in Austin. But the rest was fun.....rides, funnel cake, barrel racing, pole bending, games and fried everything. I could still eat fried fair food without getting sick then. Plus I ate a ton of fudge and pralines.A few years later when Wyatt and I first started dating, we went to the rodeo. We saw Steve Warner and rode rides and ate fried fair food. Fried zucchini spears, I think. That was the last time I ate fried anything at the fair. It was also the last time I rode an upside down ride.
We rode "The Zipper," a truly awesome ride that I will never get on again. I haven't done anything stupid at the fair since then.

But tomorrow is a new day in Fair History.

Tomorrow I will bring all 5 of my children to the fair. With my girlfriend and her 7 kids, plus even more silly ladies and their kids. Tomorrow may turn out to be the stupidest thing I've ever done at the fair. But it'll be fun!!!!

But don't look for a new post until at least Saturday night. I'm sure I'll be exhausted till then, if I'm not catatonic. When I do blog, I'll actually have some pictures of the Mississippi State Fair, which will be nice, since that's where I live now.

And I even have the license plate to prove it.

Lizzie's Treasure

My daughter Lizzie found a sweet little kitten under the air conditioner duct that connects to the basement. She was all tangled up in the ivy and weeds. This is NOT her,but presently do not have a digital camera, so here's a pic I found online that looks just like her....except our kitten doesn't have any tan coloring. Just white and gray. She's the sweetest lil' blue eyed kitty you have ever,ever seen!!! Chances are that we won't be keeping her, but I still think she needs a name. Any suggestions?

p.s. About and hour after this post, we found the momma and a few more kittens, so the first was returned to her family.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008


Try'll LOVE it!!!!

Monday, October 6, 2008

The Name Game

Hey,guys. Guess what I learned today? If I was born to Sarah Palin, my name would be...Steam Fangs Palin. What about you? Find out here:

Thursday, October 2, 2008


Each decade brings with it a new style of clothing. You had the hippie style of the 60s, the disco style of the 70s the the...well...whatever of the 80s.....wait, hold on here. What DID happen in the 80s? I remember alot of neon colors, funky hair, shoulder pads, blazers or sport coats with pushed up sleeves, the flashdance sweatshirt, and REALLY BIG t-shirts...everything was oversized. What do you call all that??? Of course their was the preppy thing going on, but that's sort of always their anyway.
Anyway, back to decades...90s were sort of hip hip, sort of hippies revisited with alot of grunge. Skateboard has been around for awhile. I'm sure I missed alot of styles...I'm no fashion diva ya'll. (shocking confession, I know) But when, exactly did less become more as far as clothing goes? Somebody please tell me why it is now socially acceptable to wear your clothes so big (if you're guy)or so skimpy (if you're a girl) that you underwear shows. Guys, look in the mirror. Pull up your pants and straighten that stupid looking cap. You look like a toddler. It's not cool, it's ridiculous. Girls, skimpy clothing is NOT attractive. It's trampy. Trashy. Cover yourselves. Their are parts of you that should be a SECRET!!Sssshhhhh!!! No showie!!! I say all that to say this: Let's try a little modesty, shall we? NO, you don't have to wear a canvas tent to be modest. You don't even have to dress normal. Just get dressed before you leave the house!
A few days ago, I stumbled across The Modesty Survey. If you are not familiar with it you can check it out by clicking here or on the link in my sidebar. This survey was done in an effort to show Christian Women that the way they dress(and behave!!!) is a BIG Ol' stumbling block to their male peers. Their are some results that were pedictable, okay... you can't prance around in Daisy Dukes and spaghetti straps, and then feign surprise when your youth leaders are blushing. But there were also some things that I found to be surprising. For instance, 46.3% of men surveyed agreed, and 25.3% strongly agreed that lines of undergarments, visible under clothing, are a stumbling block. A little odd, don't ya think? I mean, are we talking about panty lines? yucky. I just don't get it.
BUT... check THIS out, 38.6% men surveyed strongly agree and 37% agree that they have less respect for a immodest woman than a modest one.(see? trashy, not attractive)
In any case, check out the Modesty Survey. You might be suprised.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

This Day in History

On October 1,
in the year 331BC... - Alexander the Great defeats Darius III of Persia in the Battle of Gaugamela.
In the year 1207...- King Henry III of England was born
In the year 1730...- Richard Stockton, American attorney, signer of the Declaration of Independence, was born.
In the year 1800... - Spain cedes Louisiana to France via the Treaty of San Ildefonso.
In the year 1811... - The first steamboat to sail the Mississippi River arrives in New Orléans, Louisiana.
In the year 1869... - Austria issues the world's first postcards.
In the year 1880... - First electric lamp factory opened by Thomas Edison.
In the year 1881... - William Boeing, American engineer was born.
In the year 1903... - The Boston Americans play the Pittsburgh Pirates in the first game of the modern World Series.
In the year 1908...- Ford puts the Model T car on the market at a price of US$825
In the year 1910...- Bonnie Parker, American outlaw, was born.
In the year 1924...- Jimmy Carter, 39th President of the United States, was born
In the year 1943...- World War II: Naples falls to Allied soldiers.
In the year 1946...- Nazi leaders sentenced at Nuremberg Trials.
In the year 1949...- The People's Republic of China is declared by Mao Zedong.
In the year 1957...- First appearance of "In God We Trust" on U.S. paper currency.
In the year 1969...- The Concorde supersonic transport plane breaks the sound barrier for the first time.
In the year 1971...- Walt Disney World opens near Orlando, Florida, United States.
In the year 1975...- Thrilla in Manila: Muhammad Ali defeats Joe Frazier in a boxing match in Manila, Philippines.
In the year 1982...- Sony launches the first consumer compact disc player
In the year 1985...- E. B. White, American author, died.
In the year 1989...- Denmark: World's first legal modern same-sex civil union called "registered partnership"

October first is also Children's Day in Singapore, Teacher's Day in Armenia, World Vegetarian Day, AND...International Day of Older Persons.

So celebrate something. Or mourn something. You choose.